Bizmarkie Does it Again

First we had Yo Gabba Gabba, then we had the Heineken commercial in the cab, and now this.

Football Spread Picks Week 12

Split last week going 7 for 15.  Games start tomorrow for thanksgiving. Here is the quick rundown.

Thanksgiving Day or as I like to call it, All Favorites Day

Green Bay (-10.5) over DETROIT

DALLAS (-13.5) over Oakland

NYG (-6.5) over DENVER

Sunday

Tampa Bay (+11.5) over ATLANTA

Miami (-3.5) over BUFFALO

CINCINNATI (-13.5) over Cleveland

Seattle (-2.5) over ST LOUIS

NYJ (-3.5) over Carolina

PHILLY (-9.5) over Washington

Indy (-3.5) over HOUSTON

Kansas City (+13.5) over SAN DIEGO

Jacksonville (+3.5) over SF

Arizona (+0.5) over TENNESSEE

Chicago (+10.5) over MINNESOTA

BALTIMORE (-2.5) over Pittsburgh

New England (+3.5) over NEW ORLEANS

BEST BETS - NYJ, Seattle, Indy and Miami (overall 12-11)

Who is the Man??

THAT GUY ^^^^ 

BREAKING NEWS:  ZEUS HAS GOTTEN A JOB IN NYACK, NY!!!!!!!!! 

These photographs illustrate his happiness

 

 

Keep it Going Louder

Major Lazer once again shows up with some whacky video, this time for one of my favorite songs of the year. To be honest, I hate cartoons, but I am intrigued by the upcoming Major Lazer series on Cartoon Network. I know nobody does any work on the days before thanksgiving so take a few minutes and have a few chuckles while watching this video.


Major Lazer "Keep it Going Louder" from Eric Wareheim on Vimeo.

Thanksgiving Continued

The man carving the turkey above convinced me to get nostalgic and post some photos of the timeless Young Drive Family Thanksgiving Dinner.  Which involved many drunk phone calls to many mothers and grandmothers to figure out how to cook a turkey and every other part of the feast.  As they say, all the fixins were included.  I am very thankful Pilgrims landed here even with their Puritan ways. Also I am happy to report that I have well over 2000 hits on the site alrighty, keep up the good work.

Your fearless leader, ZEUS.

 

 

Thanksgiving

This probably will be the only post of the week so cherish it.  While I have to assume that most of my readers will be drinking themselves silly Wednesday night at their local waterholes, yours truly will be sitting at home.  He will be watching the world premiere of Mark Avery (pictured above), the newest star of Property Virgins on HGTV.  Apparently HGTV knows what they were doing making Avery their star during sweeps week.  Here is what HGTV has to say about it.

"Desperate to end his crazy commute, New Hampshire's Mark is hoping to move out of his parents' place and into a bachelor pad of his own. The 24-year-old has saved up a tiny down payment and is looking for a maintenance-free, two-bedroom condo near Boston that fits his limited budget and active urban lifestyle. Enter real estate expert Sandra Rinomato. She promises to find Mark a bachelor pad that suits. But is this property virgin ready to take the plunge? Mark visits a few listings outside of town, but none compare to an affordable two-bedroom condo Sandra shows him in Boston's desirable South End. Mark decides to put in an offer - But will this well-priced condo be too good to be true?"

And if you miss it because your at the bar, you can catch again when you hammered on your parents couch eating cheese balls at 3am when it re-airs. It also re-airs on January 5th.

Just a few more words to the wise.... Turkey is very delicious, but never ever let a family member tell you that tryptophan is the cause of their sleepiness.  It is another old wives tale, similar in origin to Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster.  The real reason is because you drank too much booze last night or today and did not sleep enough last night before having to leave to go to your families house.  Turkey has the same amount as any other meat.  I am already dreaming of mashed potatoes, stuffing, cranberry sauce, gravy, delicious peas and everything else.  The only thing I want to change about Thanksgiving is the ability to have turkey more often throughout the year because boy is it tasty.   

I wish all you vegans a delicious Thanksgiving.

Give Thanks,

Zeus 

Where My Dogs At?

j

I have never been a fan of MMA, I think its too brutal and has the same amount of rules as a street fight (minus below the belt hits.)  But, what I have always been a fan of is celebrity wrestling, let it be boxing, MMA, WWF, anything where the potential to watch washed up celebrities trying to quick buck gets hurt.  Now this news article stumbled upon my lap.  The canine master himself, DMX was scheduled for a MMA match after training for a few months with an established MMA group.  I don't know what these MMA groups are, I'm just guessing they are like the Bushwackers (whom I met as a wee boy) or the Legion of Doom.  Just think of the possibilities of DMX at a MMA match, I can just see him walking in dragging 5 pitbulls and Party Up blasting in the background.  It would almost be more inspiring than the criminally underrated Hulk Hogans, "I am a real American."  If that doesn't rally you around America, only dogs and DMX could.  Sadly, a just released press statement said that DMX is pulling out of the match. The only other option is obviously Coolio.  Do you not remember Dangerous Minds? If not, for the younger folks more recently you may know him from "Cooking with Coolio : Ghetto Gourmet" on the Food Channel.  The more I research both of these guys, they deserve their own posts, so be on the lookout for more.

Football Spread Picks Week 11

I almost didn't put up my weeks this week after such an abbhorent week 10. I went 3 of 14 to drop to around 55%, which is still a little above where Vegas wants me to be. But after finding the old woman pictured above, I could not help myself. I gave purpose to my life.



Miami (+3.5) over CAROLINA - I know a day late, but that doesn't mean a buck short, I almost made up for all my mistakes last weekend in one game.

Cleveland (+3.5) over DETROIT - When was the last time the Lions were favored in a game? The Lions have had top 5 draft choices the last ten years and they still can't manage a win over Brady Quinn Medicine Woman.

San Fran (+6.5) over GREEN BAY - The Packers win over the Cowboys did not convince me of anything, other than the only good player in Dallas is Miles Austin. Neither of these teams make the playoffs.

Pittsburgh (-9.5) over KANSAS CITY - The Chiefs have a lot to improve on, and that's not going to happen against Steel City. The Chiefs have lost LJ and Bowe the last two weeks, this franchise is a mess. I feel bad for Cassell, but his bank account doesn't.

DALLAS (-11.5) over Washington - I still think the Redskins are the worst team in the NFL and the top 5 college teams could beat them.

NYG (-6.5) over Atlanta - What happened to the Falcons of last year? What happened to the Giants of the last two years? I think the G-Men still got it and Matty Ice was a one year wonder ala Joey Harrington.

TAMPA BAY (+11.5) over New Orleans - The Saints are the 2nd best team in the league right now (behind Indy) but I think they are going to have trouble against the Bucs and will only win by 10 points.

Buffalo (+8.5) over JACKSONVILLE - For some reason after seeing the Bills play the Patriots in week one I always think they have a chance to break out and become a decent football team, and it has cost me every week yet I continue to back them. This is the reason why Vegas makes money, people are stubborn.

Indy (+0.5) over Baltimore - How can you ever count the Colts out of a game after last week? I know these teams always go at it hard and the Ravens are at home, but you're not showing Peyton Manning much respect with this line. I would have guessed it would have been -1.5 Colts.

MINNESOTA (-11.5) over Seattle - Minnesota defense and running back are best in game right now. Their WR are also in the running for that distinction, lets not talk about their QB.

Arizona (-8.5) over ST.LOUIS - I have never liked Kurt Warner since his days bagging groceries, but the guy somehow knows how to win even at this advance age with less than half the tools that the traitor (BF) has.

San Diego (-2.5) over DENVER - Surprised the line is not higher for the only fact that Kyle Orton is hurt. Chris Simms gave the game away last week and now owes me a chunk of change, you can't trust a man like that. (LDT needs to get act together to ruin fantasy lives right now)

Cincinnati (-9.5) over OAKLAND - All it took was the Bungals to beat the Steelers to get respect from Vegas.

NYJ (+10.5) over NEW ENGLAND - I know these are both teams going different directions. I know one coach cried at his press conference and the other admitted his mistake. But I also know these teams always play each other close.

CHICAGO (+3.5) over Philly - I can't figure either of these teams out from week to week so I try to stay away from them.

HOUSTON (-4.5) over Tennessee - Ever seen Vince Young tried to kill himself, it has been hard for me to put faith in his as a QB of a professional franchise.

BEST BETS - After my absolute sure things last week backfired due to injury and stupidity, I like the Dolphins, Jets, and the Chargers. (All Time 10-10)

I am Real American!

You may remember another classic post involving this photo.  Now one of my favorite wrestler when I was little was the Nature Boy Rick Flair.   For those of you not up on your wrestling history, he was a big rival of both the Hulkster and Roddy Roddy Piper.  As many of you may or may not know, Hulk Hogan has been a little down on his luck recently with a ugly divorce and his son in prison.  The only logical place to turn to for support would be wrestling where he is the most iconic figure of all time and a true American.  But if you believe the video below. which is said to be not staged, he is not as beloved Down Under in Australia.  Apparently Rick Flair, always a ladys-man, and Hulk Hogan and been running the same groupie circles recently and Rick Flair was there to proof to Hulk that this has been his territory for the last 40 years.

(EDIT: more info found here)

As Rick Flair says... WOOOOOOOOOOOO

Professional Sports Team Owners

I can't be the only person who enjoys a professional sports team owner who cares about his team and his fans.  The prime example is seen above, Mark Cuban, owner of Dallas Maverick.  He is not scared to take a fine if he does not agree with a referee's call or make the home locker room like a mansion.  He got out of the interweb business right before the bubble burst around ten years ago and has a very progressive blog.  I don't understand how owners do not realize that they have a commitment to the public and should not be strictly about the business aspect.  You have to spend money to make money in the sports business.  If you look at baseball, the Yankees and Red Sox spend the most money, yet somehow the owners of both of those franchise routinely make the most money from their business as well.  Luckily, we have a new entry into the fun sports owner category.  Below is Tennessee Titan owner Bud Adams giving the bird to the Buffalo Bills, if that doesn't inspire a team and fan base.

Diplo

For anybody that is interested, here is a pretty neato Diplo interview that I found with Australian Radio Triple J. A half hour interview that you can listen to on the background at work.   "Its like Gucci Mane meets Animal Collective."   Get out of jail soon Gucci.



If that is not working for you, you can find the interview here.

Pop Music

As I occasionally listen to pop music and usually enjoy myself.  I am seeing two district roads it is going down currently, today I will focus on the the adult alternative charts.  A song I am sure you are all familiar with, "I'm Yours" (video below) by Jason Mraz, currently holds the record for consecutive weeks on the Billboard Hot 100 charts with 76 week.  76 weeks  = one year and two months, that's a long time.  Well everybody knows its simple drum and upbeat reggae guitar riff.  Am I the only one to think that now other people are trying to ride his coattails, or is it simply becoming a popular genre?  Please listen to the song below by the hitmakers behind Drops of Jupiter and Meet Virginia, Train.  Did their style change to appease the masses after not having a hit in over ten years and will this become a hit?  Or am I completely off on thinking these songs are close?


Hey, Soul Sister

Train | MySpace Music Videos


"I'm Yours" Official Video

Jason Mraz | MySpace Video

Z Files Investigative Report

Many of you may have seen this man on television. Where every Sunday during football season, men all across the nation look in awe at Ed Hochuli's guns, while watching the modern-day gladiators battle across the field.  His arms get all the credit, they even have their own twitter page, @hochulisguns. But what people do not know is that the is a man behind his massive arms.  "Hochules" during the week is trial attorney in the Phoenix area.

If anybody out there is looking for legal advice, who could you trust more than a man that could physically beat you as well as in the court of law, you can send him an email at ehochuli@jshfirm.com. Or if you are really desperate there are two phone numbers on his website. Beyond those facts, he seems like a normal guy, just goes to the gym for 3 hours a day since he was "small and slow" in college.

Now Presenting....

Here is the debut single from a new artist going by the stage name of "Ozzy Cobbles."  Ozzy has a long history of karaoke with large black women named Allegra while sipping on countless budweiser bottles.  You also may recognize this man from a previous post.  This recording is his spin on the Eminem classic, "We Made You."  Ozzy is hoping to release a EP to the masses by the end of the year.  Zeus gives him his approval and is excited to hear what is coming in the future.

Good Luck OZZY!

When Keeping it Real Goes Wrong

When a marriage proposal goes wrong at a baseball game...

Football Spread Picks Week 10

I have been saying this for weeks, but luck has turned around.  Once again I put up an impressive 7 correct week.  Currently, based against the rest of America, I live in the 60th percentile.  All it took was three good weeks of picks.  I am like a freight train flattening pennies now.  Going to try to do a theme this week, with a question about each of the games.

Thursday Night - Picked Chi (+3.5) over ST and lost

New Orleans (-13.5) over St LOUIS - The best team in the league versus the worst team.  How many quarters does Drew Brees play?

MIAMI (-9.5) over Tampa Bay - Dolphins are a much better team than they get credit for.  The only thing that makes me nervous about them is there passing game is non-existent.  Can the Dolphins move the ball in the air to score if they are down late?

Detroit (+16.5) over MINNESOTA - Vikings win based on their defense.

NYJ (-6.5) over Jacksonville - The Jets are coming out of the bye hungry and want to force their point to make the playoffs, which probably won't happen.  Who quarterbacks the Jaguars?

Buffalo (+6.5) over TENNESSEE - Does anybody remember Vince Young from two years ago?

PITTSBURGH (-6.5) over Cincinnati - I don't believe in the Bengals and the Steelers are getting ready for a late January run. DA BURGH?

Denver (-4.5) over WASHINGTON - Have the oddsmakers watched any games by these teams this season?

Atlanta (-1.5) over CAROLINA - Have the oddsmakers watched any games by these teams this season?

OAKLAND (-1.5) over Kansas City - Will anybody watch this game? 

SAN DIEGO (-2.5) over Philly - Which team will show up, the team that lost to the Raiders or the team that thought Michael Vick was a good pickup?

Seattle (+8.5) over ARIZONA - Will Kurt Warner die this week?

GREEN BAY (+2.5) over Dallas - Everybody on your dick, Tony Romo? (kanye)

New England (+2.5) over INDY - ????????

CLEVELAND (+10.5) over Baltimore - Does Brady Quinn show any signs of being a no 1 quarterback?

BEST BETS -  Denver and Atlanta (overall 9-8)

Toby Jones

Toby Jones knows how to get advertise. If Toby Jones resaurant was anywhere need where I live I would definitely show up with a slab of every piece of meat from the supermarket. I would definitely want to try dino. (It's a lifelong dream of mine) Toby Jones does not just offer a good place to eat and get a massage. He also offers storage for $10.99 (drunk discount)!! (video below) Annnnnnnnd thats not all, he also offers legal services for $99.99 flat fee. (video below that)

Blast From the Past

Here is a new feature of the Z Files that I am going to put up occasionally of music from the past that has a special place in my heart for whatever reason. I like it, its funny, or reminds me of certain events. For whatever reason, this song popped up on my ipod the other day which raking the lawn. I haven't listened to shuffle in forever because usually I try to stay strictly albums, but I'm going to give shuffle another chance. Who doesn't enjoy looking at playmates and listening to some rap/rock.

Delicious Brains

Once ate here, had the brains all that good stuff. The kidneys almost made me vomit, but everything else was fine. The lamb shank was pretty solid

Rep Richard Martin

The Republican Senator from the great state of Ohio is one of the best congressman in the country.  Now, this is guy is as extreme conservative as they come.  He wants some serious change in America and surprisingly I agree with many of his ideas.  He has a lovely wife named Jazz who he refuses to allow to drink Diet Sunkist and keep its in a locked fridge unless she behaves well.  This also applies to her weight, she has to stay between a 2-3 or else no Sunkist or other pleasures of life.  Here are a few of his ads and speeches. He also has a very nice website, www.askarepublican.com

Never Gets Old

Springer has done it again. As I have previously written about, Stamford is the home for the Jerry Springer show, and now we get the first case of what this can do to a town.  One of the guests on the show was arrested late last night at a local hotel for hitting another guest.  I can see his point, if you can hit people on the show and not get in trouble, why not in real life.  Remember these people are not the most educated and that would seem to be their only way of thinking.  I can only imagine what type of substances these guests have in their body.  JERRY JERRY JERRY. (still do not know the airdate of the show I attended)

the guest in question^

Important News

As you may or may not know, I suffer from an incurable disease, known as ptosis. It involves the drooping of one eyelid.  This becomes much more promenient when someone, like myself, is either overtired or has had a few alcoholic beverages.  After doing research, I guess it is curable if it affects your vision, which I haven't noticed yet in my life, but maybe I'm missing out on something, like all the color-blind people.  For the record, I have not been bitten by a Black Mamba which is a common cause of ptosis, my ptosis is hereditary as my father also had it.  For further information please watch the following video.

Celebrity Boxing

 

I found out today after watching the local news that an exciting celebrity boxing matchup is happening in Springfield tonight. The first celebrity in attendance will be the admitted steroid user, and all-around truthful individual, baseball legend Jose Canseco. To top that off, ready for another beat-down and finally clean and sober, Rodney King. Another legend, Golden Globe winner and Grammy nominee, the consistently forgotten about, Frank Stallone.  I have been trying all day to find tickets to this event, being held at the Springfield Sheritan.  Even Perez Hilton is getting in on the action, bashing Canseco for doing this.  I would pay easily $20 to watch Perez Hilton try to box Canseco, maybe even more than that.  Apparently, at yesterdays weight-in Canseco had to say this about boxing and Alex Rodriguez.  If I don't make it to this match tonight, I'm going to regret it for a long long time.

Jose Canseco calls out Alex Rodriguez

Football Spread Picks Week 9

This is first post from the new residence in West Springfield, MA.  Lots of errands and yardwork to get done when you live in the suburbs.  I know I missed putting up the picks last week, but I went 7 for 13 last week and 10 for 13 the week before.  As I predicted a few weeks ago, I get better with age, I have jumped above the 50th percentile into the 53.9th.  And like a big rig with no brakes going down a big hill, there is no runoff lane and no signs of stopping.

ATLANTA (-10.5) over Washington - Falcons need to prove they still deserve to be in the elite of the NFC and beating the Redskins doesn't really prove much unless you embarrass them, lets make it happen Matt Ryan.

Arizona (+3.5) over CHICAGO - Cutler just whines, he can't even win over a very shaky Cardinal team.  Also, with the Cards starting a RB named Beanie, you either gotta love or hate him, there is no middle ground.

BALTIMORE (-2.5) over Cincinnati - I don't think the Bengals record reflects their talent, even with a healthy Palmer, Ochocinco, and Benson.  Baltimore is by far the best team flying a little below the radar.

Houston (9.5) over INDY - The Colts struggled last week but pulled off the win, I think this week will be a repeat performance, they have a few injuries.  I'm just hoping its not a statement game saying last week was a fluke.

Miami (+10.5) over NE - I'm scared of the Wildcat, I'm not gonna lie.  With two talented backs and the extra blocker, ten points is way too much to give.

TAMPA BAY (+10.5) over Green Bay - Everybody wants to be the wild card

Kansas City (+6.5) over JACKSONVILLE - When did Jacksonville deserve to be a touchdown favorite over a fellow bad team?  Plus, I think with LJ gone, KC will be coming out playing with something to prove.

Detroit (+10.5) over SEATTLE - Two bad teams means a close game and at least 7 turnovers.

NEW ORLEANS (+14.5) over Carolina - Does Jack Deholme retired after this game?

NYG (+3.5) over San Diego - Can't trust SD yet, still don't think they are firing at all cylinders, the same argument can be made for the Giants though. Gotta go with the home team.

SF (+4.5) over Tennessee - San Francisco has a lot of positive energy, a new QB, a healthy Frank Gore, and hope.  First time that's been in 49er land since Steve Young.

PHILLY (-3.5) over Dallas - The Eagles have to give some sort of hope to the fans of Philly.  We also have Roy Williams channeling his inner T.O. this week.

Da Burg (-3.5) over DENVER - The Broncos flaws are further exposed every week from now til the playoffs.

BEST BETS - Miami & San Fran (Overall 8-7)

World Series

And we heard from.....

anybody got an extra ticket to HOB tonight? you can get mentioned in the files? maybe an OTPHJ? Video below from Boulder, CO show me and amigos attended two summers ago. It has a special place in my heart.

Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix

I know I'm jumping on the bandwagon.  I had never heard of this band until I heard 1901, the ubiquitous song that is now even in Cadillac commercials and on WalMart online. I have had their new album Wolgang Amadeus Phoenix for a few months now and have loved it every second, and realized I haven't written anything about it yet. It is enjoyable from front to back.  Two weeks ago, I decided to delve into their back catalog with the album. It's Never Been Like That.  I am really digging it, it is not dramatically different from WAP.  Phoenix knows what type of band they are and are comfortable with that, they do not feel the need to change styles or appearance.  They finally got their big break with WAP and a SNL performance and I am happy for them.  Finally the French do something good in America, other than the Statue of Liberty and French Fries.

Best Snack of All Time?

What can I say about these that haven't been said before? Andy Capp has come out with a product that is absolutly superior to every other snack bag out there. I have gone in many convience/bodega/gas stations looking for these and many times they are sold out.  These things are that popular.  I even went out of my way to find out more info about who Andy Capp is.  He is the star of a British cartoon series. These hot fries are that good that Wikipedia classifies them as, "This snack is generally classed as junk food. A single, one ounce serving the Hot Fries flavored product contains 150 calories (70 of which are from fat), 2 grams of protein and a limited quantity of vitamins and dietary minerals.  It's ingredients include the preservative TBHQ which may be harmful in large quantities."  And they still fly off the shelves. If you haven't had these ever or forgot about how delicious they are, pick up a bag today, it will be well worth it.  Tell them Zeus sent you.